Rule Number Five

Spoiler alert:  Life under lock-down is not as hard for me as it likely is for you because, truthfully, I am not a fan of people.  Do not misunderstand.  Those I love, I love.  There simply are not a lot of people to whom that definition applies.  I am not a misanthrope or a sociopath, which is why when it is necessary for me to go out in public these days, I wear gloves, I wear a facial covering, and I respect social distancing.  I merely am someone who views anything more than minimal interaction with other someones in my normal day-to-day as something that is probably unnecessary.  It is also something that I actively avoid.  

In many regards, I am SCUBA gear.  The only distinction being that in my case the acronym stands for "Self-Contained Unsociable Breathing Asshole".  It is a trait I have carried with me my entire life. When I was a little boy, we lived literally and figuratively in the middle of nowhere. I had zero friends.  I loved playing sports.  One might think that playing basketball and football alone is hard, if not impossible.  One would be incorrect.  As it turns out, all it takes is an imagination and a willingness to hurl oneself onto the ground hard to simulate the effect of a foul or a tackle. 

My preference for alone time has stayed with me into adulthood, including into what I presume to be, and what the world at large hopes to be, the back half of my life.  I love spending time with my family and I consider my grandchildren to be the greatest gift I have ever received.  At work, I am not a lawyer that participates in "team" projects.  I have never felt the need to have the consequences of my decisions shrouded in the faux protection of a quorum.  Also, when I am not at work, my principal recreational pursuits are reading, writing, running, and playing DINGO with my dog, Sam.  Second spoiler alert:  Grandchildren and dogs are the two principal exceptions to my "not a fan of people" rule. 

Times like these are likely terrifying times for those of us who are uncomfortable in our own skin and in our own head. If you have been so affected and afflicted, then irrespective of your age, this is your opportunity to stop it.  A lifetime ago, Tip O'Neill observed that "all politics is local".  So is peace. If you have to this point measured yourself by the way in which the rest of the world views you, you have done yourself a grave disservice.  You have empowered others - including those who you should not have empowered - to exert a greater influence over your life than you do.  Stop doing it.  

Look at yourself, not at others. 

-AK

Rule Number Five

Always look at yourself in the mirror in the morning. 

The sooner you do it after you wake up, the better.  This is not done for vanity’s sake.  It is done for accountability.  If a day arrives when you wake up and you cannot stand the thought of looking at yourself in the mirror, then you need to immediately start rethinking your life decisions.

Each one of us plays the movie of our life in our mind’s eye.  It is on all the time. You can watch it whenever you want.  You will not notice it most of the time because it is on in the background as you go about your day-to-day.  In our life’s movie, we inevitably see ourselves in the best possible light.  It is human nature.  It is nothing of which to be ashamed.

The level of disconnect between the fictionalized version of ourselves and the real-life model can be quite humorous.  If you need proof of that proposition, then use “the Google” to find Defending Your Life, a movie starring Albert Brooks. Allowing that level of disconnect to widen beyond the point of humor can be dangerous.  Each day, before you go out into the world, look long and hard at yourself.  If you cannot look your own reflection in the eye, then chances are you have permitted the gap between who you are and who you want to be to widen to an unsafe distance. 

You cannot look another in the eye if you cannot return the gaze of your reflection in the bathroom mirror.  And if you cannot look another in the eye, then you have become a person you do not really want to be.